Like, it would be so cool if we could, you know, get companies on the same wavelength as their customers. Can’t you see it, man? The customer pours his heart out, and then we get a bunch of our dudes to scamper around and make a solution. It would be, like, perfect.
A few months ago, I was out in the backyard tie-dying some T-shirts and keeping one eye on my RSS reader when I saw an announcement for Agile Day NYC. Agile is a way to write software faster by not letting programmers sit down (just kidding – sort of.)
Ever since I was a little kid running around hillsides with flowers in my hair, Agile has given me visions of companies that are, like, so cool. Friendly, fast, flexible firms. Hey – that’s 4 Fs! (Freaky.)
So right then and there, I got my name on the Agile Day NYC list and swore a solemn vow to hike into the big city and figure out how to take this software approach and bring it to the masses. By masses, I don’t mean normal people, but – you know – all those business types who live in houses with bathrooms and stuff.
This morning, after 47 hours on the road, I arrived at Pace University to hold hands – figuratively, the couple next to me nearly jumped out of their Birkenstocks when I suggested a group hug – with 200+ programming dudes and dudesses.
My only regret is that Janis Joplin couldn’t be here to sing the opening ballad. Our time has come, man! After ten years of perfecting our craft, we have distilled the very essence of how companies work. Break the work into smaller pieces, man! Take all those boring business documents and turn them into really cool stories, preferably with plots and everything. (Don’t forget the steamy bedroom scenes.) This is how business works, man!
For the life of me, I cannot get my head around why every company in the Free World hasn’t embraced Agile in a giant love fest. The Agile principles are so pure, so right. And they work! But something is holding us back. What could it be, dude? I, like cannot figure out why the Man has not raced to embrace us.
Any thoughts? There really is something worthwhile happening here.