Are Companies on Other Planets Stupid, Too?

by Bruce Kasanoff on December 5, 2011

Shortly after NASA’s Kepler mission confirmed today the first planet ever identified in the “habitable zone” – the region where liquid water could exist on a planet’s surface – business executives convened in secret sessions to ask: will we soon face competitors from other planets?

The newly confirmed planet – imaginatively named Kepler 22b – could potentially support not only life, but also companies. Just imagine twice as many oil companies, or twice as many banks.

Do Keppler 22b residents also have to press 3 for tech support?

AP reports that scientists believe the temperature on the surface of the planet hovers around 72 degrees, roughly the temperature of a Starbucks if you sit near a heater.

Scientists don’t yet know much about the surface of Kepler-22b, or whether ATMs on the distant planet can remember what language you prefer to speak.

Douglas Hudgins, Kepler program scientist at NASA Headquarters in Washington, said “This is a major milestone on the road to finding Earth’s twin. Kepler’s results continue to demonstrate the importance of NASA’s science missions, which aim to answer some of the biggest questions about our place in the universe.”


1.) Will NASA continue to be funded?
2.) How satisfied are you with your car dealer?

As for the corporate strategy executives, they determined that Kepler-22b is located 600 light-years away, which means companies have plenty of time to prepare for new competitors. Unless, of course, Kepler 22b companies started heading for Earth 599 years ago.

The total number of candidate planets spotted by the telescope is now 2,326. Only 22 of them have cell phone service, which makes AT&T and Verizon very happy.

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